Sherlock: The sign of three

My wife and I were not in the least bit happy with last night's Sherlock. I say this to point out that despite the strong and negative reaction this ep has elicited from some quarters, these opinions are being rejected out of hand by certain people on the grounds that we are not the show maker, we don't know what we're talking about, what do you mean you didn't like Sherlock? it was brilliant?! We have not allowed our inner child to be more free and unchain the character from the genre. Apparently only other official script writers are allowed to point out that for a 90 minute script there sure was an awful lot of filler, at least three writers help coble this together and linked up poorly and that it took 25 minutes for any kind of mystery to occur and the final solution to the bleeding obvious puzzle made no sense. If you even allow for 15 minutes to elapse before you tune out of boredom, frustration or indifference, that's still 10 minutes longer than the most patient person would of watched.

What then unfolded was a Children in need special (that's telethon filler for those not from the UK) that ran long enough to cover 5 years of Terry Wogan taking cheques from runners for Pudsy. I know Gattis and Moffatt and that guy they were covering for were trying to be clever. And it was , in bits, but not for a full 90 minutes. In fact one of the biggest reasons those of us that hated it were unhappy was that despite at least staying somewhat in character, the ep was in the time slot that normally is reserved for Sherlock the Mystery drama thriller. I might have been ready to forgive even this if the story , such as it was, wasn't so disjointed and incoherent in it's dipping from one genre to the next, at one point becoming a BBC3 drunken youths special revelling in intoxication past the point even Packet of crisps would have gone. If you spent most of the film going WTF and hoping it might start eventually being something, it was for about 5 minutes then went back to utter confusion despite a brilliant portrayal of a socially awkward genius that would have worked if you had wanted to watch Big Bang doing the long awaited Penny Leonard wedding.

I would even  have forgiven it even if it was shit if it was one of  6 or even 12. The fact there is but one more ep left in this series means that there is a 50 50 chance the next one will be as bad or worse or marginally better or effing brilliant. I don't like those odds when deciding to choose something to watch. To mention a mates comment, three slots a year are too valuable to waste on fluff like this. We chose it to avoid all the comedies on the air at the time, we wanted drama, there had been no particular warning that it would be anything but a drama only to become a Colin Firth spectacular available on DVD for free in next weekends Daily Mail. Of course we were going to be confused and eventually angry. But just try saying that in front of some people....

And what kind of people are we that we deserve censure? The kind of people that watch a wide range of programmes and cultural content, we consider ourselves relatively open minded and intelligent only to be routinely treated to a  hyperbole of terms regularly used to suppress any difference of opinion that doesn't show due deference to his holiness The Lord Thy God Steven Moffat. How often have we or even you, yes you been right all along, totally fact based, completely sure of your information  only to be told by these wise things that they were sure you're wrong and anyway they know better. This happened several times to my wife with Doctor Who and the keepers of the faith. When rumbled by the Who docufilm confirming my wife's assertions, these people just pretended like they knew it all along, enough to make you scream.

A prime example  is this most recent quote from a Who blogger that has more than once pushed his weight around talking long enough to insure nobody else gets a word in edge wise lest he be proved at fault. But, and this is really important, this blogger thought it was great. And he, also, thinks that anyone that didn't think it was great is bloody stupid. Not just a little bit stupid but what-little-brains-they-have-dribbling-out-of-their-ears stupid. And, I don't want to talk to them. I mean, there are, of course, also people who believe NASA faked the moon landings and the world is run by giants lizards. They're also quite vocal on the Internet, I've noticed. And, are also worth ignoring.

I bet even Moffat has been heard uttering the words "I don't think it was that good" or "I might have done this better if ...." , "Boss I need more time to fix this awful script". But with people like the above rapping the fingers of those of us who do in fact know, have information and are used to a certain level of quality, we are either rendered mute to avoid offence or pretend to be overjoyed just to keep the peace.
    

The fact is that even producers of big shows with big ratings can and do get it wrong, these people are doing a job, for big money, but if they do it less well than they did it last week, we may not watch next week. And if enough people don't watch next week and the week after, programmes get cancelled. That's why those of us who watch and have opinions matter, and why those of us who write for those who watch, must pay heed to those opinions. Treating the big shots like they are infallible, leads to massive egos and even bigger divergences from the norm, whatever the norm is. By setting the bar as high as Gatiss and Moffat did with the first three eps, they opened themselves up to us saying " That sucked, I hated it because.." and they have to listen.

There is another big lie out there. Calling somebody a creator when they have only taken over an existing project that has a history and reasonable expectations, justifies them making wholesale changes to something and expecting the fan base, the network and the advertisers to go along with what ever personal project they have. Add to that the real risk that when you take on another giant like Sherlock and try to make two quality programmes at the same time, you will likely start to get sloppy on both and confuse the two shows for the same thing  when they are not.

This has now occurred and some of us have had the temerity to say so. I love Doctor Who, I love Sherlock, but if this is the future, we should prepare ourselves for the time when both are gone for good. I for one will no longer bother with Sherlock , we can only pray the combination of Peter Capaldi and a more focused Who crew will produce something  that vaguely resembles a story as they aren't now saddled with nearly as much work.

Oh and Happy 160th Birthday Sherlock Holmes, I was hoping for a better present but there wasn't anything nice in the shops so I got you this Tardis usb hub, hope you like it. 

The Impossible Astronaut: Part one

WARNING SPOILERS: If you've not yet seen this, then please look no further. Finally after much gnashing of teeth and beating of breasts, fandom on both sides of the pond can come together albeit a bit delayed , and on the same day discuss our brilliant and universally admired Doctor.

In order to stretch a bit and  make sure I'm not ruining anything for anybody... I'm going to spend a little time talking about something safe. Sad, but safe. Earlier this week our beloved Sarah Jane Smith aka Lis Sladen passed away suddenly at the incredibly young age of 63 from cancer. She was in my estimation THE companion. Part best mate, part first mate and part Doctor's conscience. Sarah Jane first showed up during John Pertwee's incarnation while working at U.N.I.T.  From that time onwards and till she left us first in her Andy Panda outfit, she became the companion we all loved. Oh we lusted after some, wanted to hug others, and yet others moved us to tears ( Adric), but Sarah Jane was the one we loved, the one we always measured the other companions too. Even in her return, years later with the 10th Doctor, it was hard not to feel the old  stirrings in your heart when she first saw the Doctor and when she finally said goodbye to him. If anything, Sarah Jane had not gotten old, she'd gotten better.  I must admit I was not a huge fan of The Sarah Jane Adventures, but even as a young adult programme it took much of it's character and force from the actress Lis Sladen, who I'm sure loved every second of it and would have gone on another 10 years if she hadn't died. Sarah Jane Smith asked us not to to forget her, how could we? Are our hearts made of stone? I'm not one to cry much or all that often, but last night during the tribute on CBBC, My Sarah Jane,  it was all I could do not to cry, nearly made it too, but then they hit us with that final montage and music. We will never forget you Lis Sladen, RIP and keep the Brigadier company. For an in-depth review of Lis Sladen's life I recommend my mate Keith Telly Topping's article.

Best comment on the night was yer Keith Telly Topping's response to my cryptic status right after Doctor Who finished.....Me: Wellll that was a sizzler wasn't it. Him: It was. Dramatic. Funny. Thought provoking. Mind you, I kept on expecting the hare to break down about every five minutes ... . Basil Brush would be proud.

Enough stalling already, The Impossible Astronaut: Part one  was precisely what it was supposed to be, a part one. If you were expecting to the Lord thy G-d Steven Moffat to neatly wrap up all the tiny details for you at the end of 45 minutes, you are clearly new to this Doctor Who thing. I will go further, while some say it was mehhh and a bit iffy, I was glued from beginning to end. It lasted 45 minutes but it felt like 20. When the credits rolled I went gahh and wanted the week to go by as quickly as possible so it could be Saturday again. This is not mehh telly, this is not iffy storytelling, it is however a master setting up a finish and adding extra layers to that story we've been wondering about for a long time, who is River Song? 

The ep opens with the throw away and yet amusing scene of the young marrieds in their sitting room watching clips of the Doctor waving at them from various points in history. A less practised hand would have been rumbled for padding, but not Moffat, this bit of theatre paved the way to making the Tardis blue card being less important than it actually was. After a bit of sussing, the numbered bit otherwise anonymous envelope yields instructions that only be from the Doctor. Fade to a dessert on planet USA and we have kicked off. Amy Rorry, Song  and the 1103 year old Doctor don't have long to wait for something to happen. And 10 minutes in shots, the Doctor is regenerating, more shots and he's dead. Welllll I for one didn't buy it. Yes he was dead, he got a lovely Viking send off, but like Gandalf the Grey, he was only hiding till later. And Presto, out the bogs comes a 909 year old Doctor. Are you keeping up people? 

Our merry band of very possible related persons now have to save the future doctor from the grisly fate of future Doctor, but can't tell him owt for fear of tearing yet another rip in the space time continuum, and wasn't that a pain the behind the last time? Moffat does well to separate the command and control structure where he usually tells them to jump and they ask why and River Song just ignores him. What with the trio plotting behind his back, Matt Smith resorts to the childish , "what's the point in having you all"  if you're not going to look at how amazing I'm being. At last  a spark of the alien egomaniac we all know lurks in every regeneration since William Hartnell got cross over being less than all powerful. 

Roll on to the Oval Office and President Nixon seems pretty cool for a cold war era politician raised on fear and paranoia. I'm surprised the lot of them weren't hoyed off to Area 51 on the spot. ANY ways, we're soon off to Florida and the source of the trouble. The Grey Amy's been seeing but forgetting since nearly the first frame, is now clearly part of a swarm or colony several centuries old. Now the last time such creatures blanked out minds we struggled to remember, this time the mobile phone is recruited in the battle to save Earth yet again. For a murderous race, the Greys are not what you would call scary in the same way Daleks, Cybermen or the Borg are. It's not like I've gotten jaded or used to uglies from outer space nesting in the bowels of the planet plotting dominion over the Human race, some of them still strike instant fear in me and turn me into a quivering bowl of 9 year old boy. This lot however still don't scare me. Like the somewhat ineffectual Sea Devils of old, these may take some time to get a bit of respect. 

And then the credits roll and we have to wait! Well Not quite, there's a lot more that happened , but that as I said before,  goes more to the story of River Song and the Doctor. Amy is pregnant, River fears something worse than her own death. What could be worse than your own death? Watching Don't scare the Hare? Another series of Candy Cabs? ( yes and yes) BBC One Comptroller Mr Cohen has a lot to answer for. In terms of Doctor who, there can only be one thing worse than River's own death and that has to be the death of the Doctor Himself. " Of course it's you, I understand" takes on a whole new meaning, but then again it could be somebody else entirely. So is River Amy, but older? Is River Amy's as yet unborn child? Will Amy's child marry the Doctor and give birth to River? As we know in Gallifreyan biology and family trees, the Hapsburgs would feel right at home and we cannot ignore any of these possibilities. My money is on Amy being River in the future, though that doesn't square with the statement of River's that they are moving in opposite directions.  If  I follow this line of inquiry much further, my brain will hurt and that is not something I need right now. 

Outstanding performances all around but Rory rises to the top of the pile with some strong moments,  I particularly enjoyed Rory as TARDIS orientation officer and funeral director, in both cases he show he could yet be a big player if he doesn't get eaten, dissolved, vaporized or other wise sent off to the old companion's home.One thing that did surprise me  was that while scenes were shot on location in the USA, the British nature of the programme was never in any danger. It's reassuring that despite being the world's greatest power, the Americans still need Brits and an alien to solve their problems. Some things never change eh? Fandom gets an echo with the spoilers banter and Amy fans will be pleased to see how she has become quite the domestic Goddess. I myself am more into the full figured River Song with her curves and barely concealed sexuality. Like the Doctor said, he likes the bad girls, and they don't get any badder than River Song. 

Something my wife said struck a chord with me tonight as well. RTD and to some extent even THe Lord Thy G-d SM have forgotten the Doctor is an Alien. He's been humanised far too much, he's been allowed to become simply eccentric without the acerbic arrogance of a superior being that finds it hard to deal with talking ants or chimps with calculators. In the old days... (here he goes again), Doctors used to get regularly frustrated at the lack of basic education and skill that humans, even from advanced eras, suffered from. Now he seems to have gone so native it's more like he's the 2000 year old man and can only tell tales of what it was like before the invention of the wheel. And when are we finally going to get stories that explore the vast space that is the TARDIS? It's like they've parked in the reference section of the British museum and  refused to  move an inch further. Perhaps If I say it often enough... from my to G-d's ears. G-d works in Cardiff, so it's not long distance like it used to be. Lastly, these Earth bound stories, are all fine and good, but we need more alien planets, more future times and creepy things in bad suits who are never pleased to see the Doctor. I'm not complaining, just wondering when we will reach for the stars again, just asking. 


In short, I loved the series opener, and look forward to many more stories. Keep em coming Mr. Moffat. I trust in your ability to make these things make sense without robbing us of all that suspense and fodder for discussion. Like Deep Thought, you have guided us from crisis to crisis, but please, no long drawn out Seldon plan, don't wait too long to free Gallifrey and return the Universe to normal service. I thank you in advance.

Doctor Who A Christmas Carol or A story of Faith, Hope and Charity

Warning, normally I don't give anything away integral to the plot, but this time I'm going to have to drop several huge spoilers to get through this. If you haven't watched this, don't read past this first paragraph .Well thank you very much Steven Moffat, for once The Doctor isn't stopping the utter destruction of London or the enslavement of all Earth by some evil race of slugs bent on forcing us to do the laundry for them. No running along in white BBC corridors screaming as death dealing Sontarans try to exterminate a group of tobacconists in South London for all their Rothman's special filter fags. No, for once we get a sweet story about Christmas for the entire family. Now before you rush off thinking it's a saccharine drizzled exercise in sentimentality, remember This is the Lord Thy God Steven Moffat. The choices are not easy and the Doctor is not infallible. The conclusions are not obvious and you will not be left unmoved by this episode. What you'll like is how the central premise and drama are wrapped in the familiar and comforting imagery of Dickens and the Victorian era. The story however moves quickly to a level that is as interesting as the three ghosts  but different.  Well acted by Laurence Belcher playing the young Scrooge central character and the always outstanding Micheal Gambon , most famous for having a part of the Top Gear Gear test track named after him and possibly for being Dumbledor, the story unfolds in a setting you will recognize without being too jaded. Dame Katherine Jenkins fills out the cast nicely as the central pivot on which all turns, and she sings an entirely new song written by Who music boffin Murray Gold. Speaking of the music, it was as traditional as you can get and comforting to boot, the entire episode is about Hope, Charity and the milk of Human kindness. A good way to spend an hour and the first Doctor Who Christmas Special worthy of the name in quite some time.

Listen to Murray Gold's song as sung by Dame Katherine Jenkins.

And now if you don't want to have the story ruined, I recommend you look away now till after you've watched this excellent hour of telly. 

Still reading? Brilliant, so I bet you noticed the passing resemblance in the opening sequence of the ship crashing to the surface and certain death if Gambon ( Scrooge ) doesn't open the cloud cover screen, to the starship Enterprise command deck . While it was amusing to see Arthur and Karen dressed up in role playing gear for their honeymoon, I must confess to an almost complete inability to make out a word they said. Not only were they essentially relegated to the side lines for most of the ep, but their involvement was a bit forced and hardly raising the jeopardy any more than the 4000 other passengers singing traditional Christmas carols were already doing. Gambon's deliciously nasty Scrooge/Kazran Sardick was biting and cynical without appearing even a bit disingenuous or unreal. The fact he is the epitome of greed is not lost on the Doctor and appeals to his own fascination with the Dickens novella he confesses to being one of his favourite.  Matt Smith manically runs around at the beginning rabbiting on about all sorts, at one point saying "Give me time and a crayon" while he tries to figure out what's happening and coming up with a game plan. 

It's when the Doctor understands that whatever is bothering Scrooge is in his deep past, that the story really starts. The core question of the ep becomes do you think the Doctor is right in adding memories and experiences to the Scrooge character's life in the hope of changing him and his ways. In the Dickens story, Scrooge is hoyed around by  three ghosts from his youth through to the possible future, but never is anything ever added to alter the man who must take the choice to be good on his own. But here our favourite Time Lord is not shy about deciding to give the junior Scrooge the benefit of a better more rounded and less sheltered existence. There are consequences even at the best of times, but clearly the Doctor doesn't try very hard to find out why Abigail has volunteered to be frozen for eternity. But it wouldn't be very Dickensian if the heroine of the piece wasn't deathly ill, choosing to live as long as possible then choosing to live well in the short time she has left. Or to quote The Doctor at the end, "Better a broken heart, than no heart at all".

The reason you watch this one is not to see if the Doctor convinces Karzan to help rescue the crashing ship, it's obvious he'll succeed, no , it's to see the end game of his plan. Will it make things worse, or is he only leading Gambon's character to the same place he was at the beginning of the ep, but by a different route, thus showing that even Time Lords are stifled by what could only be described as fate and destiny. In the end, the Doctor's actions are neither clear or morally justified. If anything, it's the power of love to overcome all and the healing touch of Abigail letting Karzan understand why he resisted Christmas and her for so long. His heart is finally softened  not by his near violent encounter with himself, though it helps mightily, but by Abigail telling him it's OK to let her die, she enjoyed her time,  happy it was always Christmas Eve with her beloved.

The pay off is seeing Gambon and Jenkins winging their way through the settlement skies pulled by the tame shark one last time. It's a testament to the quality of the story that I wasn't doubled over laughing at the thought of seeing Futurama's retribution inflicting Robot Santa burning small children and pummelling thieves and those who grassed them out in my mind. Ok I did anyway, but only for a second. So did you buy the flying fish? Doctor Who has never been strong on actual theoretical science, but for once it was based on postulated life forms one might find on other planets even within our own solar system. I did however have a hard time buying into the sudden transformation of Clyde from man eating shark to Rudolf the not so killer great white shark. At most, the bit of sonic screwdriver would given the beast a case of indigestion. As a device to add a bit of Crimbo fun it works if you don't think too hard about it, Doctor Who is still after all  officially described as a children's programme. By that qualification and the fact it's a Christmas ep on at 6 pm , you can forgive a lot, after all , we accepted a sarcastic mechanical dog for years.

 Some of the best scenes worked well because of the very idea of what was happening. When for example the Doctor goes back to a 12 year old Karzan, you know it's a recording, but because it never happened before, it's happening Now and in the past and the old Karzan is flooded by new "old" memories he knows can't be real, and yet they are. The other really touching bit of acting is when Abigail kisses Karzan to let him him know just how she feels and to say good bye when she knows there will likely be no more Christmas Eves ever again. Time travelling love has been done before and this was among some of the best.

Some other outstanding lines from the ep include ... "it's either this, or go to a room and design a new kind of screwdriver. Don't make my mistakes!" , "You know what boys say in the face of danger, don't you? Mummy!", and of course the opening narration by Michael Gambon is very nice when he explains how we are Halfway through the darkness and why we humans have always celebrated that as a way to pat ourselves on the back for having made it. Tell me honestly how you can be left unmoved by "On every world, wherever people are, in the deepest part of the winter, at the exact mid-point, everybody stops and turns and hugs. As if to say, well done. Well done everyone.We're halfway out of the dark." . BTW Did you know Santa's real name is Jeff? I wonder if he's related to the moustachioed Geoff over at Top Gear? 

Props wise, other wise known as marketing, we saw plenty of Fezes and bow-ties, because as we all know, Fezes are cool and bow-ties are just as canny. At one point there was even a Tom Baker Scarf moment, so the travel montages were not just filler, but well researched and designed to press buttons in fandom. The other refreshing aspect of the story is the clear decision to carry on from the long standing support of and continued participation of Doctor Who in the BBC Proms series, with operatic music as the style of choice. Murray Gold in the Who Confidential immediately after the ep, reveals the track used in the final cut recorded by Dame Katherine Jenkins was a rough demo that made most finished polished works by current pop stars look like the weak efforts they are. Doctor Who is promoting quality and genuine singing over the screeching of Simon Cowell acolytes who are depending entirely on good looks and self correcting recording tools. Extra tidbit Who fans, Galli Base mate Patrick tells me that in "Doctor Who Decalog 3: Consequences"? Steven Moffat had a story included in that collection of short stories, called "Continuity Errors." Yes, the story had Silvester McCoy's Doctor, but the plot of "A Christmas Carol" was taken wholesale from that tale, and dressed up for Christmas. With sharks.

Will I watch this again? Honestly????? Yes . if only to have the closed captioning for the on ship dialogue and to finally wrap my head around the the idea of time meddling in the very creation of a person's life choices and attitudes. Going as far back as the Daleks, the Doctor has had a hard time wiping out entire species and people if he thinks they can be reformed. The inner do-gooder in this Galifreyan has time and again got in the way of a perfectly justifiable execution or extinction. Tonight's reaction was no different viewed in the context off his long history of seeing the best in even the most vile of creatures and races across space and time.

As one of many bits of telly on offer this Christmas season, the DW Crimbo special succeeded as both a  seasonal traditional programme heavily steeped in the music and meaning of the Holiday and as a sci fi story asking the sorts of questions we have come to expect from Doctor Who.

To watch the ep on the iPlayer  or to read more about Doctor who

Is Top Gear past it's sell by date and other unmentionable thoughts?

As television watcher and reviewer, I take very seriously the prospect that a production company is watering down the product or not doing all it can to entertain me. Conversely, if it's not broken divn't fix it.

Top Gear, a programme I've been watching, it seems like for ever, is it possible it's gone soft in the middle and lost touch with it's audience? Is it possible the Guardian and a few other Top Gear haters are right? I only ask as that I myself found myself getting weepy at the sight of vintage British sports cars on one of the eps of the last series. Top Gear sells itself as a car enthusiast's magazine. From such a show I expect to be informed, educated and entertained. If I'm honest I'll admit that sometimes it verges on the sentimental and soppy when they revisit the classic cars, but are they out of date? I don't think so.  I can honestly say that the presenters reflect the interests and cares of the average  modern BBC viewer. Through all the silliness that keeps me coming back for more, it seems enough car news and automotive knowledge seeps in that I can carry on an intelligent conversation about the latest trends and features in motoring.

And lets talk about the silliness. Jezza and his uncensored tongue, are we really that sensitive that we need to read the most base and unpleasant motives into his every utterance? He is what he is, a bufoon, an opinionated man who says what he thinks and talks of what he sees. He is not a hate monger or a wind up artist, why should he pretend things he's seen haven't happened? The worst reaction I've had to his jokes is to not have laughed at a few of them. He means no harm and he incites no one to violence, if you don't include views on motor-homes and their owners. Jezza, Capt'n Slow and the Hamster are every knot of 8 year old boys in men's bodies. We like what we like, we think farts are funny and we call a spade a spade. I don't think it's a crime to be funny and informative or to go miles out one's way to make a point. To quote the lunatics at Myth Busters... "If it's worth doing, it's worth overdoing". If the critics want a dry dull documentary style auto show like you can find on any other network they should be watching those, I however want to be amused and kept wondering what happens next.

So the new series is in filming at the minute and we'll be getting a new Stig. Seems the old one was hoping to make a few quid after hiding in a white suit for 7 years. Ben Collins who replaced Perry McCarthy when he got rumbled, was on the point of being rumbled himself. I suppose it's only natural that these things happen. I hope the next Stig is better at keeping his mouth shut and his eyes covered. Which of course begs the question... what colour will the new Stig be? Will he still be white? Will the new reasonably priced car perform as well with the new Stig? Will we kill a few more Morris Marinas with pianos? Will there be more crazy road races? Who knows, but I'll bet the answer is yes to the last 2 questions, why change what works, we expect certain things and if it still works, Top Gear should not stop doing them. At it's core, Top Gear does what it's supposed to do well. The whole fastest production car record was gripping and worthy of any serious news story about auto-mobiles. While I don't expect Jeremy Paxman to drop frogs down Mishal Hussien's blouse, the serious people could learn a thing or two from the hyperbole of Top Gear presenters. The road trips in Bolivia, The North Pole and Vietnam to name only a few were as good as or better than some BBC4 travel programmes.

My other un mentionable thought is even worse than the first.... Is it possible that the RTD years of Doctor Who were .... how to say this ... too slick?

I ask this as I have been re-watching early Who from the start and have also begun re-watching Ashes to Ashes. I cannot however bring myself to watch much of the new Doctor Who after Ecclestone. It's not that they weren't good. On the contrary, despite my criticism of Russell T Davies and his decision to isolate the Doctor by making him the last of his kind, the eps were gripping first class drama. They squeezed out tears fears and exposed the raw nerves and bizarre paranoia that lurks in all of us. No the eps in question, with  several Tenant exceptions, are lacking  the kind of individual scenes that taken separate and apart  could serve as humorous interludes, small slices of Doctor life that inform more on the character than just the current story line.  Re-watching the old Whos and the Gene Hunts, I found myself looking forward to many specific scenes and was mouthing dialogue as if it was HHGTTG, Torchwood or a Python sketch. Perhaps my core criticism is that RTD took Doctor WHO too seriously. He turned it into Spooks in Space and Time for a while.

Moffat by contrast, in choosing to craft a Doctor more related to the Throughton era, has written or had his writers create scripts that are increasingly manic at times and have from the beginning allowed a longer peek inside the world of our favourite Time Lord. While he still scares socks off our feet, he hasn't edited it so close to the bone that we don't get the intimate moments you used to get when Tom Baker had the luxury of 5 or six eps to sort out a story. Another thing, Moffat (or RTD before him) hasn't gone bananas with the special effects over the merits of the written word as acted by actors and actresses. Despite a mammoth budget compared to say Sarah Jane Adventures, Doctor Who is careful not to dazzle you with too much sizzle at the expense of substance. When Matt Smith talks to Auton Rory, he does so in a manner you could enjoy if it had been in any other story. It's one of many bits I want to see again. I suppose what I'm saying is that I want the shmaltz and the humour and the personal stuff like we used to get before it was boiled down to one hour, one story.

A propos of nothing, next time you watch a show on telly, pretend the cast is on a near empty sound stage,  then picture a painted back ground, if the acting and the writing still holds up even with the barren set, you know you've got something special. 

A great format about to change is that of Master Chef UK. I like the current format, I know the Australian version is massive and breaks records. But I've seen the format in the US version. It's got weeping contestants telling sob stories to get in the starting 20. I don't want to see three weeks of preliminary frying of eggs mixed with tear jerker stories of just how much this will mean to them if they win. For me it's always been about the cookery. I stopped watching X factor and BGT for the same reasons. The success of Master Chef UK so far has centred on the notion that the cooking is the star, the ingredients are the supporting cast and the contestants are aware they are only there as long as the cooking is up to par.  I don't care if the contestant is a single mum or a struggling artist, for me it's down to one thing....as Greg Wallace says,  "But can he cook?". The perceived need by production companies to inject pathos is incomprehensible, what's wrong with just talent?


Till next time ....So long and thanks for all the fish.

Fezzes are cool The Pandorica Opens part 2

With apologies to Douglas Adams  possibly the funniest man in modern times to touch science fiction.

The Pandorica Opens part2 was everything I expected from the Moff.  Well paced, not entirely incomprehensible once you'd seen it in it's entirety and FUNNY. Moffat is humour , Moffat is the spirit of adventure fused  to the innocence of the by gone serial only ever successfully brought back to life by Indiana Jones.Every few minutes something happens that tugs at your heartstrings only to be replaced by an Abbot and Costello moment funnier than the last. A more cynical person would accuse the writers of writing to formula, but that would be like saying a recipe well done is nothing new. You still like the cake your nan baked even if she's done it a thousand times. This new Doctor finds new ways to keep the story moving using plot devices that engage your mind but don't take your brain for granted. For every question it answers it asks another and answers it. Even the ones that have left you hanging  like what about the shard? and how'd he do that without staying in E-space? Where did that crack come from? get conveniently pushed on the deliciously sexy and dangerously attractive River Song.

The next series is clearly going to be where all that banter between River and the Doctor gets fulfilled. Is she married, is he asking her to? The answer is YESSSS .  And yet you know it can't end well. She tells us it won't. We know there will be an explosion, we feel the invisible hand of the exiled Time Lords working their influence on him them from behind the slo-time envelope. Matt Smith series two will be a CRACKING one.

In one of the best scenes of the episode and not the only one to make you go back to HHGTTG, Rory decides to stay behind and guard the box our Amy is in. There is a combination of complete innocence and love with very real comedy moment that makes you think "the first million years were the worst, then the next million years were ....".  Ghosts of Marvin, the android who waited. Rory unlike most boyfriends in Who 2 , has been given a really respectful and sensitive use in the story arc. He keeps coming back as a dramatic reference point in the life of Amy Pond. Clearly while her imaginary Doctor is the stuff of her dreams, even wet ones judging by the snog she'd like to give the Doctor, she loves Rory and always has. A little  thing like non existence or being turned into an Auton won't stop that.

On the subject of our Amy, that little actress who plays young Amy. I ordinarily cannot abide small children in Doctor Who, it's not a children's programme, not like we imagine them to be these days, but this little girl can travel with the Doctor as often as she wants. This bright little ginger spark Caitlin Blackwood  lit up the screen from the first second she appeared. Inspired casting that could have gone horribly wrong, had us reading books of emotion on her face as she took us in a Madeline sort of trip from the social worker to night at the museum. Poor little girl with no parent in that big old house. The Doctor will take care of her. He loves her. not like he loved Rose, that was the kind of mature, fully explored sensual and sexual love, this is the love of a Father for his daughter, albeit adopted. He even shows up to dance at her wedding. I'm a grown man  but I nearly cried then.

The device of the Pandorica is interesting in and of itself. It fills a number of roles, mysterious puzzle box, bringer of life, back up file storage and representation of the finger of God himself. No one explains where the Pandorica itself came from or who built it. It's just there. all powerful, very mysterious and clearly keyed to the dna of the Doctor and Amy. Part machine part Diety, the Pandorica IS Pandora's box whence springs al lthat is good and all that is evil. For without one the other would not exist. The Pandorica is the creation myth retold for a new generation.

If I had to name a MOTM for the episode ? Hmmm tough call but I'd have to go with little Amelia, she made the whole thing work. she was the glue that bound the main players together. Her scene in the museum with older Amelia and the Daleks later on worked only because little Amelia worked.

On the whole as Paulo Nutinni would say , 10 out of 10.